[Music] that's right can everyone hear me if I speak at this level yes good all the way in the back good all right awesome all right hello my name is Jacqueline I am a licensed social worker and preventure good consant for preferred Behavioral Health Group preferred Behavioral Health group's mission is is to change lives and save lives across the state of New Jersey at preferred be Health Group our goal is to help individuals to find Hope heal and Thrive within the community and within preferred Behavioral Health Group I a prevention consultant for the NJ fors Compass mod program and I'm here tonight with Nicole Clark and Joe grel in the back who is running around here FL so tonight we are here to find the keys towards unlocking the secrets of Online safety a Guardians guide to General online use for um youth in this presentation we will be discussing what social media is and popular gaming platforms privacy settings and how to protect your youth's personal information discussing the the importance of open communication with youth about online activities and tips for recognizing and addressing cyber bullying so most of us are aware that social media plays a significant role in students lives on the one hand it can be a very productive platform that allows our youth to connect to peers community and more and on the other hand being safe online navigating how to do so can be very intimidating with social media being such a prevalent part of daily life it may seem overwhelming for parents to try to limit your child's use the CDC Centers for Disease Control and prevention recommends no more than 2 hours of screen time for social media a day and additionally the minimum age requirement for most social media platforms is 13 with more recent um studies showing that it's really they shouldn't be joining to at least 16 um so now let's discuss popular social media apps that um students use today so raise your hand if your child's either on Snapchat Tik Tok Facebook Messenger or Instagram no no yet okay and and out of all the platforms I mentioned Snapchat is probably the most popular platform um that that youth are using and if your student is on Snapchat photos can be saved and or reproduced by screenshotting and Snapchat also has an advanced location service that shows your students's exact location to hide the location settings must be turned off and actually changed to ghost mode now that we have more insight on social media let's move on to another topic that's Which is popular gaming platforms um by show of hands is your child on any one of these platforms fortnite Call of Duty FIFA thank you in the back uh Minecraft Madden Roblox all right so is there any other games that aren't up here that you observe your child playing that maybe aren't listed up here steam no what was it steam yeah okay any any other games in the back that I didn't mention okay all right so we want to encourage you to be mindful about the messaging capabilities on each one of these gaming platforms um most of which connect you automatically to people of all ages in various locations when specifically looking at PS4 Nintendo or Xbox lives they all have messaging capabilities even outside of actively playing the game just over a few months ago in our own backyard an 11-year-old girl from Wayne um New Jersey was kidnapped by a 27-year-old Delaware man after communication through roblo and here is that low clip breaking please say a 27y old man from be Delaware kidnapped a New Jersey girl that he met on an online gaming platform that's usually aimed at youngsters Roblox the incident is sparking an alert for parents about the Online safety of their children Ash news reporter Katherine Scott is joining us live from The Newsroom with details it's frightening so many people who have kids who love to play Roblox so many people use that online gaming platform Tam but that's what police say uh was the method how these two met each other but so far police haven't said how this 27 Old Man uh took this 11-year-old girl it's actually pretty easy for a 11-year-old and a 27-year-old to talk on really almost any platform Darius a be Delaware accused of kidnapping an 11-year-old girl he met on the popular online gaming platform Roblox police in Wayne New Jersey were called around 6:45 a.m. on September 10th for a report of a missing child and she was found soon after police determined that mlet wi met the victim while playing Road luux and transported her 135 mi from Wayne New Jersey to be Delaware without her parents knowledge police did not say how the girl was taken he was extradited and is now being held in the New Jersey in jail he faces up to 30 years in prison if convicted now a warning to parents Roblox has more than 54 million users each day nearly half of them under the age of 13 media platforms as well as the gaming platforms have security protocols and preferences that are there based upon age appropriate use and those protocols can be handled or or Changed by by the user Ro provided a statement to BC News saying that they've reached out to law enforcement and are offering our help and we work tirelessly to prevent grooming on our platform and have a team of thousands of moderators who enforce a strict set of community standards we're live from news and Captain Scott Channel 6 a news all right thank you Catherine I knew this one all right can you hear me all the way in the back yeah okay so as you just saw the messaging capabilities across these gaming platforms can put anyone anywhere in bad situation and they also mentioned grooming in the video can anyone tell me what that [Applause] means yeah it's through communicating kind of um gaining the trust of a younger person to attempt to kidnap them or to just win their confidence or purposes yeah thank you all right so on the topic of Online safety um we would be doing you a disservice if we don't mention artificial intelligence also known as AI due to its prevalence in today's world AI technology refers to computers or machines that are programmed to perform tasks that we usually think only humans can do by copying human thought and behavior the technology is used to predict things such as how a virus May spread or what videos to watch next online or to make decisions on Poss like how an essay should be graded I would also like to preface that we are definitely not experts in AI but AI is rapidly making its way everywhere from our thermostats to refrigerators to our televisions and it has also made its way into social media and online platforms that youth are using today now there are several positive aspects of AI which include um it can help youth develop new skills improve the their vocabulary and increase their knowledge many students turn to grammarly which is an online typing assistant tool that helps to review spelling grammar punctuation Clarity engagement and delivery mistakes do you all use grammarly in the back there sometimes all right cool so AI systems can also offer recommendations for who to follow on social media or what songs to listen to AI technology can also spark a child's interest in stem which is science technology engineering and Mathematics but with the Positive also comes the negative aspects of using ai ai systems need a lot of data to learn and if sensitive personal data is collected it can have an impact on a youth's right to privacy through AI applications fake images can be created and with the rise of students using AI there has been real stories in the news about fake photos being generated and falsely distributed to peers throughout many schools this is a serious concern as there's no current laws against this in present day youth are becoming less social because they are forming a Reliance on developing um social bonds with AI however AI lacks human like qualities like ity empathy and limiting its ability to understand emotions or produce original ideas and this is ultimately affecting our child's um social emotional well-being and speaking of the news again a few months ago in Union County New Jersey fake pornographic images were generated by artificial intelligence which caused an uproar that circulated throughout Westfield High School and in in addition to social media platforms there are other dangers and concerns regarding Internet safety for children so four simple T tips we can offer you is to First teach your child to walk away from Surprise content two check your child's browser history regularly and don't allow them to clear it three recognize that cyber stalkers and people with ill intent lore people through a variety of different platforms and four consider adding parental controls to your child's devices or to your router and remember to educate your kids about never opening unexpected messages never click on any links that are sent through email or text messages before checking with the person that sent them and these are just some of the ways that some hackers um get control over your devices and you can tell your kids that they can Mark messages as spam or junk until they talk to you or ask you about it if it's okay to open and the best approach for browser safety is to build um a child's critical thinking help your child learn how to spot things that may not be what they seem and make smarter choices online inform them about some of the reasons why someone might be using the dark web and remain anonymous and how that can cause arm and at the end of the presentation we will hand you a little card that looks like this that has two different QR codes on it one for social media platforms and the second for gaming platforms and it brings you to two different websites that gives you a list of all of the social media and gaming platforms we talked about and how to help you set the parental controls and privacy settings for each one and so far we've covered a lot of information um can we clarify anything do you have any questions so far now let's discuss safety tips that you can use to further protect your child these are simply things to be mindful of as you navigate sharing photos information and more of your child please trust your own judgment and take these tips as it works best for you um we don't want you to take away from your child's accomplishments but realistically how many people do you really know on Facebook um there are predators that can easily access your child's personal information depending on what you choose to post approximately 9% of all Facebook accounts are fake and approximately 8% of all Instagram accounts are also fake we want to stress switching for your account to be private not public and by doing so only your approved friends on the platform will be able to see your post remember remember don't share Child's full name School home address and be mindful of how often you share um full face photos of your child and keep in mind that this applies to parents carers and youth um consider this too often um our youth don't think before they post they post a thought that they may think is funny or a photo that they feel good about or a reaction to an issue within a matter of seconds the whole world can see what they've posted and most of the time this isn't an issue however um we need to help them avoid making a damaging mistake and here are four things to consider before posting on social media first who will read it there's always the potential that any post can go viral nowadays there is no social media police and law enforcement have no presence on the internet two how will it make others feel that read it before posting students should consider the audience who may be reading that post or hear about it not just those to who they send it directly will the post embarrass anyone will it hurt someone's feelings will it make someone feel picked on or excluded third how will it represent them unfortunately we live in a quick to judge society and we encourage you to think what opinion will be formed when your child posts when our youth post they are sending a digital representation of themselves and when their posts include pictures or videos Others May form opinions based off limited details that they see consider having a conversation about this with your child and finally who does it represent not only do their post represent themselves but they also represent everyone associated with them from their clubs to their teams school extended family workplace and social group they need to be aware that post don't just affect them their post reflect all their Association and all of those tips we just shared can also be appli to conversations with your child about Online safety it is possible to have open communication with youth about Online safety while you may know what information to not give out it could be more difficult for your child to understand their safety is important and that there are simple steps to take to ensure that they're remaining safe before we begin discussing safety tips we want to encourage you to fost a non-judgmental environment when discussing online activities and safety for example this may begin with leading the discussion with curiosity about how active your student is online and what platforms they have knowledge about already here are five Internet safety tips for you first don't give out personal information this includes your home address school or phone number number never send pictures to strangers um even though some youth know not to talk to strangers they do not see sharing information in chat rooms as the same situation emphasize to them that if they would not talk to a stranger walking down the street in a parking lot or in a store that they should not be talking to them online keep passwords private except from guardians parents and caregivers should talk to should talk talk about the sites and apps students use and their online experiences you should discuss the dangers of interacting with strangers online and remind them that people online don't always tell the truth explain that passwords are there to protect them from things like identity theft don't download anything without permission by downloading something it may possibly contain a virus that can harm your computer file sharing can allow other computers to view all the files on your computer which means that your personal information might get stolen and finally tell a trusted adult if you receive a mean or strange message encourage youth to tell a trusted adult right away if someone says something to them that makes them feel uncomfortable they should also tell an adult if they see any bullying or threats online h [Applause] [Music] [Music] I [Music] oh got pathetic oh what you serve buddy I appreciate you bringing this to my attention with pal Noah has a well history of incidents mind do The Quiet Ones always get picked on we take theing very seriously we can't police the internet of course but I'll make her heard of it [Music] [Music] two [Music] [Music] oh oh my gosh I'm so sorry hey are you [Music] okay hey r k k k you're kind of quiet those kids still bothering you hey just don't let those jerks on the internet get to you you're lucky nowadays you can just block facee Clos [Music] [Music] [Music] sh [Music] are you okay oh [Music] [Applause] [Music] hey are you [Applause] [Music] okay man this sucks [Applause] I'm really feeling that one I know right [Music] does anyone know that purple goop kind of represented did anyone catch on to that yeah it's kind of like the abuse that they're carrying from other people um stop something like that you're not in the classroom with them and girl report it she got it too so now we to turn it over to my colleague Nicole so all right so we're going to go right back into some content are you guys ready that Des thank you so cyberbullying could happen to anyone of any age any youth unfortunately are no exception to this no one has the right to make your child feel unsafe uncomfortable or bullied online but luckily there are many things that we as adults parents caregivers can do if cyber bullying does occur so when to report um rules vary depending on the platform you're using but the types of material which are likely to break the rules include the following impersonation which is pretending to be someone else uh hate speech violent or extreme content inappropriate content harassment threats abuse and bullying so here are there we go five strategies for dealing with cyber bullying so we don't want to respond or retaliate we recommend taking screenshots we want to try to stop frequently checking posts follow up when you're calmer and finally report and block the post we strongly encourage you to keep that open line of communication that Jack was talking about earlier in the presentation with your child that way if they notice or experience any issues online they can communicate these things to you or any trusted adult in their life so now that we've talked about open line of communication about Online safety and cyber bullying we want to reinforce the importance of teaching youth to set healthy boundaries and fostering respect kindness and empathy online so let's take an example of your child playing fortnite or any other game on on the computer with his friend Tony Tony gets extremely upset every time they're they lose a battle in the game and maybe you hear your child becoming frustrated with Tony what might you suggest as parents caregivers to your child what would you say suggest that they do when they're playing fortnite with Tony to help set some healthy boundaries in this scenario it's a fictional scenario but it could happen and probably does happen often so what what might you do in this situation with your child what might you suggest does anyone have any ideas to stop the game to stop the game that might be a good way to do it right just stop the game maybe walk away teaching your child it's okay to walk away if he your friend getting upset that's uncomfortable for you right we're just going to stop the game that could be a healthy boundary set would anybody else have a different approach okay good thank you for that response I appreciate that so we have some options that we we thought of so you might want to suggest your child respectfully shares the frustration with Tony if they're close enough so for example hey Tony I really love playing fortnite with you but I get a little frustrated when the emotions are really really high and when we lose do you think we can talk about a better strategy for the next game instead of becoming so upset maybe you suggest to your child that that the child kindly says hey Tony you seem upset is there anything I can do to help maybe you share that your child can uplift their friend with some EMP empathy by saying hey Tony I know you're upset but we can we got the next round we can do this and just like we had your recommendation share with your child it's okay to walk away from that game for a bit or stop the game fully great thank you guys for that so before we wrap up tonight's presentation we are going to discuss how online use in general impacts our children's mental health the risks of social media use are linked with various factors so one may be how much time you've spend on these Platforms in general and a study focusing on 12 to 15 year olds in the United States spending 3 hours a day using social media was linked to a higher risk of mental health concerns that study was based on data collected a little bit ago from more than 6,500 participants the warning signs that social media is affecting your child's Mental Health maybe they come obsessed with their profile struggle with comparison difficulty being present in the moment struggle with anxiety and depression and false sense of community how teens use social media also might determine its impact in general for instance viewing certain types of content may raise some teens mental health risks this could include content that depicts legal acts self harm or harm to other people encouragement of habits tied to eating disorders such as purging or restrictive eating youth who post content also are at risk of sharing sexual photos or highly personal stories this can lead to teens being bullied harassed or even blackmailed being exposed to discrimination hate or cyber bullying on social media also can raise the risk of anxiety or depression so the big question what can we do what can we all do so if you are concerned about your child's behaviors it's important to get that appropriate care as shared by our partners at spts known as the society for the prevention of teen suicide what we can all do is know our role and that we have been empowered to take out action as we move through crisis and help build resilience as parents and caregivers we are accountable to pay attention and recognize any warning signs we want to have those honest conversations where we listen and validate more than we talk so you might wonder how did how do we validate our youth when they are talking about difficult topics and feelings it means that we recognize that the youth gets to feel the way they do and we do not have to agree with what they are saying but we can listen and empathize with those feelings so as a recap what to do in these moments we want to look for those possible warning signs we want to talk to our child we want to listen and validate and we want to know where to get that appropriate help I have a question sure what should we do when they don't just not willing to talk you let see you you see inside you're talking with them and you're encouraging them to to share with you and yet they're not sharing the answer is like I'm all good I'm okay it's all good but you obviously see that it's not I would continue to keep like asking them because they know that you're there for them and so maybe next week when you ask them maybe they'll finally like open up to you about it um but just showing like just showing up for them and showing that you care and you're asking for them wellbe I feel like that that's big so just pushing for them to to share in in well not pushing them but just like if uh you keep asking the question it shows that you care so that might mean you know a [Music] lot walking down so the other thing I would say is are you asking that question in a vacuum or are you observing changes right right so when you observe changes that gives you the opportunity to then reference the changes so you would say to your son or daughter I've noticed that this is happening and I'm concerned can you tell me what's would you please tell me how you feel so so instead of like diving into the nitty-gritty of the details of what happened deal with the changes that you're seeing right so I don't I want to talk about necessarily specifically what was said online I mean I hope I get to some of that but I want to address the changes that I see so Nicole referenced that we um this particular slide came from the our good friends at the society for prevention fend suicide where it's adapted from their material and and they have a little thing that they say in their training that says act on facts feelings actions changes threats and situations so when you see changes when you're observing changes in your child um speak to them specifically about the changes so don't just say I'm wor I don't want you on the computer anymore address the specific changes that you see and see if your see if your child can help you draw the connection between what's happening in their online life and the changes that you're seeing was that helpful yes absolutely okay thank you you're welcome there we go all right so now I want to ask you a question you could just say yes yes or no question uh would you drop your child off in a large city by themselves no I got it a couple laugh it's a pretty yeah it's a pretty yeah maybe you want to sometimes I like that answer that's funny right but maybe you want to sometimes after a frustrating Monday or just a frustrating time but we want to give this analogies to get you guys thinking a little bit so a city comes with both the good and the bad so the bad side of a city could be a higher crime rate uh goods and services are more expensive it could be very overcrowded which could play you know place a lot of stress or pressure on someone and you might not be able to form such a Titanic Community as opposed to one in person but the good side of community could be creativity of expression through ART or museums and dancers performers uh maybe shorter Tri mutes diversity of people and places and there are amenities everywhere theaters major leag Sports uh museums concert venues there's tons to do there's tons of liveliness so we want to kind of suggest to you that the internet is sort of like a city in this way all of those good and those bad aspects of the city that we just shared all relate to navigating that big large internet safely and together with your child all right and this slide is just help where and when you need it and finding the right help right during a crisis situation can be challenging so on our websites we have extensive list of Mental Health Resources in the state of New Jersey um including hot lines contact information warm lines things of that nature and again please keep in mind your fastest response will always be 911 in a life or death emergency there we go but if you want to stay connected to us as NJ fors Compass this is all of our social media platforms you can also scan the QR code up there if you'd like to stay connected with us we are on Instagram we are on X also known as Twitter we are everywhere that you can probably find us speaking of social media um we'd love to stay connected with you you can stay connected with us we are a brand new program so we're excited to be here also just want to mention a couple more resources for you there we go C connect so Compass our program is partnered with something called to connect to provide you with free mobile friendly help for stress anxiety and depression that accessibly fits around your busy life so you can scan this QR code um and if you want any help with this we'd be happy to help it will take you to the registration page where you can register as either a youth or an adult this is fully free for you or your youth to use so for example if you had the app you could use it for meditation you could go on and just see what's there for you it's completely free highly recommend taking um advantage of these services and we recommend that you register with your personal email if you can to avoid that confirmation email being blocked by any filters or going into spam and just a little just kind of thing of what TOA is um it's a suite of online tools with resources available for students ages 13 and up school personnel and parents and caregivers so just before we wrap up we talked about a lot this evening online Internet safety oh thank you jacine um online Internet safety popular social media and gaming platforms cyber bullying AI the list goes on an overall impact of Mental Health [Music]